The businessman’s guide to putting on lipstick

The Lipstick Building in Manhattan is famous for its architecture. It is a commercial office block which is now associated with capitalist greed, theft and lies. The history of the Lipstick Building is fascinating. I, however, have a new fascination with lipstick. Lipstick has given me a new insight into how to approach new business ventures.....as well as inter-personal relationships


My daughter, Noa Ariella, put on some lipstick, walked over to me, and asked:

'So, what do you think?’

With that kind of question, any man is bound to get into trouble with a lady. It's almost as risky a question to answer as the 'Do I look fat?' question.

But, in my continuing effort to be honest with my children, and teach them that there is good and bad in the world, ugly and beautiful in this world, good ideas and bad ideas in this world, I approached the lipstick idea the way we 'rational' thinkers usually approach things, when we want to be -what we usually call - ‘brutally honest’.

Brutal honesty is important. It should highlight pros and cons. It should be thought out. It should be mindful of whether something has potential, or not.

But, in most cases, ‘brutal honesty’ should be called ‘rational negativity’

I looked at her lips, with the lipstick, and I immediately had a view and an opinion on how the lipstick looked

I proceeded to say the following***:

“You can't be upset with what I'm gonna say about your lipstick. You asked for my opinion, and I'm gonna be honest regarding what I think about your lipstick. I have your best interests at heart, so you need to hear, what I believe, is right. And the truth may hurt. Being brutally honest means that you may have to go back to the bathroom and have a rethink about lipstick, your lips, and beauty. It means that you may still have lots of work do. It means you will have to challenge the underlying assumptions you have about lipstick and beauty. It means you must be willing to do a lot more work, and then, some re-work. So, do you really want me to be honest? Do you really want to know what I think about your lipstick?”

She said: “Yes”

I said………………. “I think your lipstick looks beautiful”

And I meant it

I could have used every rational argument to dismiss her good lipstick idea. I could have said:

“You asked my advice, and you may not like what I have to say. I think beauty-care and lipstick are good ideas. But, I have your best interests at heart. And because I care about you, I am going to be brutally honest with you. You should know, that using lipstick means you will get caught up in all the things that wearing lipstick and beauty-care require. And those things are tough to deal with. Those things are challenging. Those things are time consuming, require lots of energy…. and some money. So rather don’t wear lipstick.”

Following the lipstick encounter with this particular lady, I now prefer the approach:

“You asked my advice, and you may not like what I have to say. I think lipstick is a good idea. But, I have your best interests at heart. And beauty-care and lipstick are good ideas, but because I care about you, I am going to be brutally honest with you. You should know that using lipstick means you will get caught up in all the things that wearing lipstick and beauty-care require. And those things are tough to deal with. Those things are challenging. Those things are time consuming, require lots of energy…. and some money. So, on your path to beauty-care, be warned that there will be challenges. Beauty-care and lipstick are good ideas, and you have my full support in facing (intentional) those challenges”



***Not verbatim. Due to the fact that I am indeed a licensed poet, I used poetic license

Note to the person who read this far:

I still have no clue about lipstick or beauty-care.

But my daughter does

Judge Goldstone, I salute you

I'm a Jew. A proud and partly-practicing Jew. I support the State of Israel. Proudly. My goals, as per my religious beliefs, are to better myself, relate kindly to people and contribute positively to society and the world around me. These are in accordance with just some of the Godly laws I follow.

Judge Richard Goldstone recently authored the UN Human Rights Council's report on the Israel/Gaza conlict. This report has been 'somewhat' controversial

Judge Goldstone, your life work, life goals, and achievements are aimed at fighting injustice and contributing to the betterment of society. These are noble humanitarian goals, based in humanitarian (and Godly) laws.

Judge Goldstone, our goals are similar, if not identical, most of the time.

Our paths differ

Judge Goldstone, you are no extremist. You do not agree to the murder of innocents. You are not a serial killer who ignores societal/humanitarian laws. Humanitarian laws that are aimed at promoting individual and social development. You are not a man who ignores westernized, societal laws which are aimed at the betterment of the world. Your laws say the murder of innocents, or the abuse of the helpless, is cruel, and you are obviously not an extremist of your world. You are not a murderer. Murderers in your world don’t abide by the laws that most people in your world abide by. Murderers in your world are extremists. As are thieves and rapists. They don’t live by the laws of your society. Laws that most of ‘your’ people live by. Laws that contribute to the betterment of society.

I am semi-religious, practicing Jew. And I support the State of Israel. I am not a religious extremist. I am not an abuser, or war criminal, who ignores God's laws. Godly laws that are aimed at promoting individual and social development. I am not a man who ignores God’s laws which are aimed at the betterment of the world. My laws say that the murder of innocents, or the abuse of the helpless, is evil. I am not an extremist in my world. I am not a terrorist. Terrorists in my God-fearing world, don’t abide by the laws that most people in my world abide by. Terrorists are extremists. As are those who molest children, or deal in human kidneys. They don’t live by the laws of my society. Laws that most of ‘my’ people live by. Laws that contribute to the betterment of society.

Judge Goldstone, you are doing, what I would call, Godly work. It’s aimed at the betterment of humankind. And I, as a God fearing semi-religious, proudly Zionist Jew am trying to do the same thing. I respect your ideal. I admire your goals.

I don’t follow your path. I have my path.

There are extremists who disobey the common-good laws (whether human inspired or God given). And we have to deal with those. Secular extremists, and religious extremists ignore the laws that most secular and most religious people believe in. We need to support moderates in each other's camps and deal with the extremists in our own camps

Goldstone is 'Cain', or any similar talk, is ridiculous and extremist. Judge Goldstone is someone who holds dear to his heart every ideal that I do. His path differs from mine. And there are billions of other God fearing people who follow God’s laws. And there are extremists who do not follow these laws. Moslems who blow up busses, Christians who molest children and Jews who deal in kidneys. They are extremists, not the norm. Don’t use them to accuse me of having a flawed system or path.

You follow a different path, aimed achieving humanitarian, Godly goals. And that is great. You're the kind of moderate that should be supported in this world.

I too, am trying to do good in this world. The State of Israel is trying to do good in this world. Please don’t ignore the good that forms a basis of my goals. Please don’t ignore the good that forms the basis of Israel’s goals.

That’s what the extremists do. That’s what the terrorist do. They just don’t want to acknowledge the good that I do, that my people do, that the State of Israel does.

I am not going to let the path become the goal. That’s what extremists do. An extremist will kill me for the way I approach God (path), as opposed to work with me because I too acknowledge God (goal). Focusing on the path is a waste of energy. Focusing on the common goal is where our energies should be focused. We’ll all be a lot more successful and productive. Do we honestly live for our goals, or have we let the path become our goal? Are we extremists?

Please, Judge Goldstone et al, do not use extremism, or flaws in the ‘God’ camp to negate what we have to offer. And I will not use extremism, or flaws, to negate what the ‘humanitarian’ camp has to offer. Let us work together where goals converge, and not fight where paths differ. If you are not respecting and acknowledging someone else’s contribution to the betterment of themselves or the world around them, you are an extremist. Because that’s exactly what extremists do. That is what terrorists do. They refuse to acknowledge the good work Jewish people do, or the amazing work the State of Israel does. They have focused their destructive energies on our 'differences in paths', and have ignored our common goals.

Let’s not be extremists, who ignore the positive contributions others are making to this world. Let’s use or common goals as a source for construction

Judge Goldstone, I'm a practicing Jew, lover of God, and supporter and the State of Israel. I'm not an apologist. I have a path that I follow, in order to achieve certain goals. I don’t follow your path, but I acknowledge, respect and admire the Godly, humanitarian work that you do. And I ask that you do the same for me.

In conflict with what was reported in the Sunday Times article, I am not “disenchanted” with you, Judge Goldstone. Your goals are Godly. I cannot ignore the Godly good you are trying to do for the world.

Please don’t ignore the same Godly good, I (or Israel) am trying to achieve

Let’s not be destructive extremists, focusing on our differing paths.

Let's focus our constructive energies on achieving our common goals